Hello there. I just want to first say I appreciate all of you so much, dear friends! Your continued warmth, encouragement, and prayers are treasures to me. I cannot thank you enough.
I have had what I will just call “pit days” for quite some time now and I am realistic enough to know there are likely some pits ahead, but I do feel the fog lifting, praise God. 🙂
Now, I alluded last time to different ideas I felt God might be downloading for revitalizing this space.
I have even toyed with the dreaded word “monetize” in order to boost our family’s situation, seeing as most other roads seem closed at present, but there is nothing concrete there.
That said, monetizing or no, I have to acknowledge there are inklings…and I am finding myself with a rather interesting problem as a result.🤔
I have several different inklings…and the unusual quandary of which ones He’d have me to follow.
This from the woman who has had her creativity more or less frozen for nearly a year.😏
So…what are these inklings I speak of?
Well, in general, being a creative sort, I have been pondering the ways which stir my creativity most and still keep the necessary “Just a Jesus Girl” component. I mean, I really don’t think that should or ever will change.
Of course, tops is writing. That cannot and must not end (Well, duh. 🙂).
Then, I thought of my baking. I have considered if I might have an avenue for sharing some of the cookie secrets that have had my family and our youth group happily sugared up for so many years…
My passion for oldies- be it movies, music, books, or television- is a little tougher to call a creative pursuit so much as sharing my joy of others‘ creativity, but this fount of trivia inside does cry out for someone else to listen sometimes-besides my poor family. Believe me, they get plenty of my rambling 😁 (Though it has given two of my kiddos the respect of being experts in rare trivia in Scholars’ Bowl, so it has its perks) .
And then, last of all, is the thing I landed on introducing first…
And that is my art.
Ok. Now, if you take a trip in the Wayback machine to the archives, you will occasionally see a hastily scribbled doodle or two from me, but it has been a long while since I shared any or attempted anything in earnest.
Like many things in the winding walk of depression, it dropped off after a time.
And then, one day-down in the pits-the painful scratching sensation deep inside begged to be excised. I picked up a charcoal pencil, a few oil crayons, and began to sketch out what was happening within.
Now, I did it at first with no notion of really showing it to anyone. This sort of art was a far cry from my classroom bulletin board days.
The sort of expression which I guard perhaps even more closely than any other.
For, perhaps, it is a level of raw exposure even beyond the written word.
Not to mention the tastes on this particular medium are so very much in the eye of the beholder…
And I am so often reluctant of my oddities being under the observation of said beholder. 🙂
But, I have been stirred in my heart of late and encouraged by friends there is worth in opening the door a little further.
So…in the spirit of sucking up courage, taking another mincing step in trust, screwing my eyes shut and pushing the publish button, I present my first piece in a long while, along with a poem inspired by it…
Minutes drag in snagged up lines,
Yet years seem to swallow the hours on a dime…
Heart was once a brimming palette of hues
Yet emptied now of any power I can deduce.
All the color feels drained from my being
And harshest winds hiss a hideous refrain:
“Nothing is true. Nothing is freeing…”
I know it’s not so.
It cannot be.
I was sure there was a time
Someone set me free.
But something in the mad swirl
Of watching my joys cast themselves off
In this bleak downturn of my world
Steals at the strength of my resolve,
Makes me forget He on whom it should revolve.
Oh, Lord, help me gather these scattered pieces of my soul!
Remind me that, even in these draining days,
You and Your truth alone remain in control…
Thanks for reading, dear friends! Blessings and prayers! ❤ May we each remember He alone remains in control.